Let’s Buy New York from Trump – Arab's Ultimate Power Move
Have you ever stared at a map and thought, "You know what the Arab world is really missing? More overpriced coffee, traffic jams, and a giant green statue holding a torch." Well, lucky for us, we now have a once-in-a-lifetime shot at making this brilliant dream a reality.
Let’s buy New York from Donald Trump!
Yes, you heard that right. New York could actually be ours. Because what could possibly go wrong? We just need a little help from you to make it happen.
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Why New York?
Because who doesn’t love burning money? For just $5,000 a month, you too can live in a "cozy" (read: microscopic) apartment where your shower is in the kitchen and your window overlooks a brick wall.
Wall Street: Where dreams are made… and crushed. If you enjoy watching finance bros aggressively high-fiving while debating crypto, this is your paradise.
New York food: Because who needs a stomach lining? Pizza that’s better than your last relationship, bagels that might solve world peace, and hot dog stands that are either a culinary miracle or a stomach gamble.
Freedom: But like, extreme. New York offers ultimate freedom. You can wear a tuxedo at 3 AM, take a subway ride with a live mariachi band, or witness a pigeon stealing a slice of pizza—all in one day. Just don’t expect to find parking.
Broadway: Come for the talent, stay for the ticket prices. Witness breathtaking performances for the price of a small car. Or just watch a guy in Times Square dressed as Spider-Man butcher "Bohemian Rhapsody" for free.
Why Trump Might Sell New York?
Let’s be real – Trump loves New York, but only his New York. The moment the city started favoring bike lanes over luxury car parades, we’re pretty sure he started drafting a sales pitch.
And hey, we’ll even throw in unlimited access to Trump Tower’s golden escalators to sweeten the deal.
As for New Yorkers? Please. They’ll complain about the sale just like they complain about rent, subway delays, and pineapple on pizza. Nothing new here. If Trump wants to sell New York, he’ll sell New York.
Perks for Donors
10 USD
A personalized thank-you note from the mayor (or at least a digital one).
100 USD
A virtual tour of Trump Tower (not hosted by Trump himself, sorry).
1,000 USD
A lifetime supply of New York-style pizza (delivery fees not included).
10,000 USD
Your name on a billboard in Times Square (for exactly 3 seconds).
1,000,000 USD
Exclusive ownership of a single pothole in Manhattan (maintenance fees apply).
Our Totally-Not-Made-Up Supporters Love Us!
Or they will... as soon as we bribe them with overpriced coffee and a free “New York Is Ours” bumper sticker.
Trump is the Best!
Selling New York to the Arabs? Genius move! Finally, someone who understands that real estate is about flipping cities like NFTs!
Chad McCapitalist
Wall Street Investor
Absolutely Revolutionary
Finally! The city will have REAL shawarma, not whatever that overpriced lettuce wrap nonsense is. Wall Street can be renamed ‘Falafel Street’ too!
Ali Al-Falafel
Shawarma Tycoon
5 Stars, No Question
Honestly, as long as they build more five-star brunch spots and keep the traffic jams exclusive to influencers, I’m in!
Karen O’Privilege
Real Estate Guru
Let’s Buy New York from Trump – ArabResurgence’s Next Big Move!
Disclaimer: This campaign is 100% real… in our wildest dreams.
Contact: pleasedont@arabresurgence.com
Share the Dream!
Special thanks to our Danish friends at Denmarkification
Without their inspiration, we’d just be another group of dreamers without international land-grabbing scheme. 🇩🇰